


The Raccoons' Stuck Sneezes

by sarahgirl1998



Series: HTF sneezefics [43]
Category: Happy Tree Friends
Genre: Allergies, Comedy, Gen, Humor, Short Story, Sneezing, Stuck Sneeze
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-08
Updated: 2018-09-08
Packaged: 2019-07-10 04:40:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15941981
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sarahgirl1998/pseuds/sarahgirl1998
Summary: Because I can't bring myself to use Lifty and Shifty's names in the title of any story.When Lifty and Shifty are both having trouble trying to sneeze, Sniffles decides to use one of his strongest sneezing powders to help them out.





	The Raccoons' Stuck Sneezes

“Ugh...” Lifty sniffled audibly as he rubbed his nose. “My nose is so itchy right now.”

“You and me both, bro...” Shifty was also rubbing his nose, which was twitching slightly. He stopped after a few seconds, however, when his breath hitched a little.

“Huh... Haaaah...” Shifty tilted his neck back as Lifty looked at him in concern. Both of them knew exactly what was going to happen... “Haaaaaaah...”

But Shifty’s breath suddenly returned to normal, and he tilted his neck back to its normal position. He groaned slightly and rubbed his nose again with his arm.

“It’s... s-stuck...” he lamented, as if Lifty didn’t get it.

Lifty thought for a moment about what to do, sniffling every few seconds or so. Suddenly, he got an idea.

“Maybe someone can help us,” said Lifty.

“Don’t we have anything here that can make us sneeze or something?” Shifty wanted to know.

“Probably not.” Lifty rubbed his nose again. Shifty didn’t realize it, but he felt a sneeze beginning to build.

“Not even pepper?” Shifty asked.

“I already tried it. Didn’t work... Haaaah...” Just hearing the word pepper must have irritated the insides of Lifty’s nose even more, because his inhales worsened. “Aaaaaah... HAAAAH...”

Right before Lifty could release the sneeze, however, the urge slipped away from him. The raccoon sniffled and rubbed his nose with his forefinger.

“You know what? Maybe we could use someone else’s help,” said Shifty. “How about Sniffles?”

“Yeah, sure. He does like seeing others sneeze, after all...” Lifty gave another sniffle.

The raccoons proceeded out of their apartment, heading to Sniffles’ house. Along the way, they couldn’t help but keep sniffling and rubbing their noses. They had a few false starts, but neither of them sneezed for real. It didn’t help that the pollen count was pretty low today. They tried looking into the sun a few times, but that didn’t work, either.

Eventually they arrived at Sniffles’ house. Shifty rang the doorbell, and after a few seconds, Sniffles answered the door.

“Hey, guys. How are you?” he greeted them.

“This may sound weird, but we really need your help,” Lifty said.

“Oh, sure.” Sniffles moved out of the way so they could come in. “Why don’t you come on in and tell me what’s wrong?”

Lifty did as he was told, as did Shifty shortly afterward.

“Actually, Sniffles...” Shifty started. “We’re having trouble trying to sneeze.”

Sniffles was almost in disbelief. “Pardon?”

“I keep feeling like I’m gonna sneeze, but then I don’t sneeze,” Lifty said.

Sniffles thought about this for a moment.

“I believe you two have stuck sneezes,” he stated. “Not that I haven’t seen this happen before, I just didn’t believe you when you told me.”

“So can you make us sneeze?” Lifty asked, and then sniffled as his nose twitched again. “Ugh, not again.”

“Yes. I’m sure that if I tried one of my sneezing powders on you, it’ll work,” said Sniffles.

Before Lifty could respond, he started inhaling again. “Aaah... Aaaaaaaah...”

Not long afterward, Shifty started inhaling as well. “Haaaah... HUUUUH-HAAAAAAAH...”

Realizing what was going to happen, Sniffles ran out of the way and plugged his ears. Just when he thought they were going to sneeze, however, he didn’t hear it. He nervously removed one of his fingers from his ears.

“Huh?”

“It’s okay, dude...” Lifty sniffled audibly.

“Just another false alarm.” Shifty rubbed his nose a little with his hand, then rubbed Lifty’s nose.

Sniffles went over to his desk for a moment, and then pulled out a bottle of multicolored powder. He returned to Lifty and Shifty.

“Uh, what’s that?” Lifty wanted to know.

“This is one of my most guaranteed-to-work sneezing powders,” said Sniffles. “It contains pollen, dust, a bit of feather fluff, some flour, some dandelion pollen and black pepper.”

Lifty and Shifty both winced in fear as they heard him list off the contents. He had used all of their allergies in the sneezing powder. This was going to make them sneeze for sure, they could tell...

“Don’t you have anything... less strong?” Shifty asked, bargaining for Sniffles to try something else.

“Well, I do, but if you want me to get your sneezes out...” Sniffles removed the lid on the bottle. “So be it.”

The raccoons took a minute to think about this, then finally accepted.

“Fine.”

Sniffles began to shake the powder directly into Lifty and Shifty’s faces. Immediately their eyes widened, their pupils shrunk and their nostrils started flaring up. Their allergies had made them sneeze multiple times before, but this was a sneezy sensation unlike any other. Their eyes then watered slightly as their breaths began to hitch. They tilted their upper bodies as they inhaled in unison.

“Aaaaaah... Haaaaaaaaaah...”

Sniffles backed away from them, put down his sneezing powder and plugged his ears once again. With a final dramatic inhale, Lifty and Shifty exploded at the same time, with the biggest sneezes they had ever let out in their lives.

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-CHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!”

They shot their upper bodies forward as they released the sneezes, with a huge amount of saliva emerging from their mouths as well. Sniffles was a bit relieved that they didn’t sneeze on him, but he still cringed from hearing them sneeze in the first place. How could anyone hear that and not lose their hearing, at least for a few minutes?

“HAAAAAH...” Lifty and Shifty suddenly inhaled again. The sneezing powder wasn’t finished with them yet. Before Sniffles could do anything, they exploded into a massive sneezing fit. And every single sneeze was released in near-perfect unison.

“AAAAAAH-CHOOOOOOOOO!!! HAAAAAAAH-CHOOOOOOOOOOO!!! HaaaaaaAAAAAAH-SHUUUUUUUUU!!! AAAAAAAAHHHH-SHOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH-CHUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!! HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH-SHHHHHHHHHHH!!! HAAAAAAH-CHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! HAAAAAAAAHHHHH-SHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! AaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAH-SHIUUUUUUUUUUUU!!! HAAAAAAH-CHIUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!! HUUUUUUUUUH-CHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! HeeeeeEEEEEH-CHIUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!! HUUUUUUUUHHHHH-CHIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!”

“Oh, my...” Sniffles whimpered to himself, but he couldn’t hear himself as he did so, thanks to Lifty and Shifty sneezing their heads off.

“Aaaaaaah... HAAAAAAAAAAH...!!!” Lifty and Shifty were getting close to the end of their sneeze attack. This was going to be the big one. They tilted their necks as far back as they could go, fanning their hands in front of their faces. “HUUUUUUUH-HEEEEEEEEEEEEHHHHHHHHHHHH...!!!”

After that final inhale, however, there was a long pause. Sniffles was almost convinced that the sneeze had faded away, but before he could open his mouth to speak, the two most explosive and ear-splitting sneezes finally made their ways out of Lifty and Shifty’s bodies.

“AaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-CHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!”

After what seemed like an infinite number of seconds, Lifty and Shifty finally recovered from their sneezes. To their internal annoyance, their eyes were filled with tears and their noses were bright red. The raccoons sniffled and rubbed their noses with their forefingers.

“Ughhh... my head hurts...” Shifty commented.

“That... was... insane,” Lifty said.

Sniffles unplugged his ears and went back up to the raccoons.

“Oh, my! Gesundheit, you two!”

“Thank you...” Lifty and Shifty said as they continued to rub their noses. They wouldn’t stop, especially not after that monster of a sneezing fit they had just been forced into.

“Are you feeling alright?” Sniffles asked in genuine concern.

“I... I don’t feel so good...” Lifty said with a sniffle.

“Me neither,” said Shifty.

Sniffles put their hands on the raccoons’ foreheads, but they were burning up. He gasped.

“L-Lifty, Shifty! I think you’ve fallen sick!”

“From our allergies?” Lifty didn’t sound like he was amused.

“I’m afraid it’s entirely possible,” Sniffles lamented. “Here, why don’t you let me take care of you?”

The raccoons could only nod in acceptance. They really weren’t feeling so good, anyway.

“Well, at least we finally got our sneezes out...” said Lifty.

A few minutes later, Lifty and Shifty were sitting on the couch and watching TV. The two of them had thermometers in their mouths, which Sniffles removed and looked at.

“I’m afraid it might be a while before your fevers cool down,” he said. “I am so, so sorry...”

“It’s alright, Sniffles. After all, you did help us with our stuck sneezes,” Shifty said with a sniffle.

“Thanks for that,” Lifty replied.

Sniffles smiled at them. “No problem, you guys.”

“But next time, go easier on the sneezing powders, would you?” Shifty asked.

Sniffles chuckled to himself as he nodded. He then briefly left the room to get them some ice water, while Lifty switched the channel on the TV to an episode of Tootie.


End file.
